I’m not feeling there’s any lengthy topic in me today, but perhaps just a few small ones. First is oral sex. In Tantra, foreplay is a major part of the practice…and oral sex is not just for the genitals. Kissing every part of the body, touching it, caressing it, licking it is what 
makes the most erogenous zone you have become erect with pleasure….ever seen the skin of your belly tighten with excitement? Ever seen the hair on your lover’s arms stand on end because you’ve caressed him/her so delightfully, that they are sighing and writhing under your hands? Your mouth should be attuned to your lover, giving their skin just what it wants….A delicate flick of the tip of your tongue here…a rolling lave along the curve of that spot just there…a sucking kiss there.
Tantra is all about a certain direction of sensation play…that of intense, prolonged pleasure. Now, if you are not light handed in how you touch someone, prolonging stimulation to the skin will simply become irritating, not pleasurable. Vary the pressure and the places you touch and kiss and lick, so that no one spot gets over stimulated.
Use touch and oral play to bring each other close to orgasm several times, prolonging the orgasm to get the energy in the body to incredible heights. This teaches the body to tolerate a great deal of pleasure and to hold lots of energy.
I mention this alot in many posts. What do I mean by holding energy? Well we all know what it feels like to build toward orgasm. Orgasm is simply the building of energy in an area until spontaneous release. Traditionally that is from the root and second chakras. We all know what the pressure feels like. Bringing it up and then letting it wane slightly so that you can build it again and higher is the key to making the top of your head pop off when you finally do cum.
In any case, I wanted to talk about cunnilingus a little. I’ve already done a post on the Spiritual Blowjob and there’s reference material about how to do a really good hand job in that post, but I’ll share yet another one, called Honoring Vajra, so you fellas don’t feel left out. *winks*
In any case, to pleasure a woman, you need to relax her whole body, not just go for the hot button. Most women need some slow build up and even if they enjoy a good quick hot poke, that’s not what Tantra is all about. Its about building energy toward raised consciousness.
So slow is the word of the day here.
Rub her all over, caress and kiss her. Don’t be goal oriented. Forget about orgasm altogether. Go only for making her skin sing. If you do that, you’ll have the right approach here.
When you do finally find yourself at the genitals, rub little circles all over the mons and labia so that you’ll get the pelvic muscles to relax fully. When they are relaxed from this long slow massage, they will be more willing to participate in the orgasm, which will likely make the orgasm expand out of the womb to the whole genital area. Gradually work your way in to caressing the inner labia and the clitoris if that’s something you know she likes. Otherwise use your tongue for this. Don’t focus on the clitoris. Make it a part of a whole skin experience. When you feel the time is right, massage the pc muscles inside the womb. Go for relaxation, not orgasm.
When you’ve got all the good stuff relaxed and juicy, you’ve got a willing woman…so begin the slow process of cunnilingus for real. Bring her up to but not beyond orgasm, several times. Talk to her. Let her guide you, but also use your intuition. Learn to read her signals…and have her confirm them to you until you are crystal clear about them over and over again. Women are moody creatures, so sometimes signals can get crossed, just keep confirming until you get a set of signals that are fail safe.
In any case, back to the original session…At some point, playing with her gspot very lightly in little circles will add to the raising of energy. Go for wispy tough fellas. And don’t go for large circles that encompass the whole gspot. Caress initially until you have identified the entire area with your finger, so that you know how big it is and where it ends. Then only rub a tiny area of it for a moment or two at a time and then move on. this leaves you the whole gspot to play with for a long time. If you rub the whole thing firmly, you’ll find the area looses some sensitivity and you’ll have less control of her orgasm.
Get to know her body a bit…find out what she really likes. Perhaps, she’s more ready for orgasm with the addition of intercourse into the foreplay and then going back to more foreplay. Perhaps, all she ever needs is the tip of your tongue on her clit and she’s got the top of her head popped off. Maybe she’s there with just caressing her labia. You have to figure her out. Get her to help you. Learn her body and her pace and rhythm.
Understand that it will be different each session you make love. You have to listen closely with your ears, your focus, your fingers and your mouth. Listen.
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