A couple days ago, I was reading a post on Tantra about Spiritual Eye Gazing. This topic of gazing into each other deeply and soulfully is one that ripples across my mind and heart…because it is something I crave. I need to be seen completely and filled with love from that gaze. I feel shy and hesitant too…even though I know full well how beautiful the experience is. I still want to hide from that deep gazing. It also makes me think of all the times I did this practice in a dancing form.
In Tantra, gazing upon one another like this is generally a part of the ritual….one that I often find difficult to do. I’m a very emotional person…and Tantra makes me feel profoundly deeply. It just washes over me….and I am well aware that my gaze holds my emotions. I often avoid holding any one’s gaze for that reason…that and I have a habit of making others truly uncomfortable because I miss nothing when I look at someone. It is just who I am. I am very observant. I don’t wish others to feel uncomfortable with me, so I glance rather than gaze unless I notice they are comfortable with me holding their eyes for conversation.
This practice is something that I need to work on. I need to build that fearless trust in being naked and vulnerable emotionally with my Partner….and I need to build Him into that sort of intimacy. It is an intimacy that I think maybe He isn’t used to…and which I think will nourish Him in ways He doesn’t even suspect He’s hungry.
I have been thinking also about aftercare…the loving moments following the passion of bdsm, when the Dominant is petting, caressing, soothing and holding the submissive as s/he comes down from the high of the spankings and other play the two have shared…
In times past when I practiced more regularly, my Husband would hold my gaze during aftercare. I sometimes felt like I was falling into Him in those moments. I was wide open. I was His in those moments and there was the sense of closeness that many write of when describing the aftermath of bdsm play…Within that closeness is the potential for an even deeper experience with such a spiritual practice….
The last time my Husband did this with me we feel into a vision together. Now that’s unusual, I want to start by saying….and I want to add also that we not only practice shamanism, we teach it. We’ve used the skills of trancing and have taken shamanic journeys together for so long, it is not at all startling that we’d fall into a mutual vision. But a vision is a spontaneous event. Something given by a Divine consciousness that isn’t sought for. It is like having a file downloaded into the mind and gets put on automatic run mode…The vision just plays out in the mind. It is rapidly over. Visions usually happen so rapidly it is almost impossible to catch them….or they feel like the remnants of a dream that’s fading so rapidly you can hardly catch them….yet they happen when awake. And there is the sense of a caress from something great and powerful touching your mind.
The gaze opened me for that experience, just as it opened Him. We had practiced tantra for years. We’ve not had such an experience since then…
Funny…I haven’t thought of that incident in years now…but it plays over in my mind now. I cannot remember the vision now. I only remember that many of the images I saw, my Husband also saw. But we each had a unique experience.
Regardless of that very unusual event, the impact of working with the gaze in this manner brought us closer to each other. We experienced an intimacy that I’ve never felt with anyone before. What I feel with my Master now shows every indication that it will rapidly reach a similar level of intimacy…We are both ready for that intimacy.
If this post intrigued you, I hope you’ll give gazing a try for awhile…It often takes time for each partner to fully open to the experience of it…but it will make a significant impact if you’ve both experienced a drop during bdsm play. Most people talk only about sub drop, but Dom’s drop too…they just do it differently. When you’ve both dropped is when you’ll likely notice the deepest impact of the practice because you’ll be have let down your normal masks against deep intrusion into your internal privacy. Getting past those masks is the key to experiencing the magick of the gaze.
I am a student of spiritual practice. I like to learn about how it effects others…so if you try it, I hope you’ll come tell me about it.
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